Crispin's 2nd Poem

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    CrispinFreemanWatcher16
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    Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 12:09

    The Dove

    As I wake each day...I'm greeted by the sun's warm and loving rays...
    I'm as spirited as many birds can be...I notice this spiritually white dove...
    I begin to spend a lot of time...enjoying my everlasting days with this white dove...basking in the warmth and joy of this dove...

    I long to be with this white dove...as the breeze of the calming winds wrap its arms around me.....this white dove who has shown nothing but pure joy to me... it has seen many things thru its dark pools of black eyes...the hate of the world..which has made the heart of the dove tougher...the sparrow inside of me longs to just say "plz, let me into your heart"...I long to mend the damages of this dove's past.

    So that this dove can one day.....spread his wings freely and be unchained from the land that has intertwined into this dove...I show this dove all the wonders of being a free natured bird...no longer latched to the land but hopes towards the sky....

    I rise early one day...to the hope of forever embedding my love to this unique dove...i fly to the spot...of our marvelous encounter...but to my astonishing eyes...i find the white dove lying in the patches of blanketed grass...I'm heart broken to see...that the life and breath of the dove has past from its body.....but i know that this dove has finally become free from its attachment to the land.....

    I sing as mourning and joy for the white dove...for it has finally broken frm its cage of tyranny into...the skys of hope..forever free....as a breeze of trees sway...i feel a calming and tranquile..whisper of "thank you".
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    theBOSS.
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by theBOSS. on Tue Jul 01 2008, 12:21

    dang.
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by neon kun on Tue Jul 01 2008, 12:30

    deepness. awesome, cris! ^^ you're a real good poet.
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    CrispinFreemanWatcher16
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 12:33

    thanks mikel & death^^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by azuki_dashi16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 12:35

    Puppy Dog Eyes Wow!
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    CrispinFreemanWatcher16
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 12:36

    thanks azuzu!
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by Sasori Kung fu masta on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:15

    love it! Love
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:22

    thanks sori
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by King_Of_Blades on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:23

    oo Puppy Dog Eyes great poem
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:25

    thank you james^_^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by King_Of_Blades on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:26

    ur welcome ^^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:28

    You should read my first poem.^^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by King_Of_Blades on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:29

    i might later
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by MissQoolKat on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:41

    Puppy Dog Eyes I love it. Amazing.
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:42

    thank u kat^__^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by Akia on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:46

    "It's really really good^^!"
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    CrispinFreemanWatcher16
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 13:46

    thank u akia^__^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by Claud-kun on Tue Jul 01 2008, 14:10

    It was beautiful ^_^
    Nice work Cris.
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    CrispinFreemanWatcher16
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 14:12

    thank u alot claud^__^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by Titaniumxvx on Tue Jul 01 2008, 14:28

    That's tragic..The dove dies but it's spirit has risen..

    Thatr's amazing, Crispin. Wow. Amazing
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    CrispinFreemanWatcher16
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 14:32

    ^///^*nods*yes, thank you titan.
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by GL on Tue Jul 01 2008, 14:44

    wow, so beautiful! :D
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by Aichu on Tue Jul 01 2008, 16:16

    Very good, very beautiful Love You have a unique stucture going there. A couple spelling mistakes and some chatspeak, but you have a lovely voice ^__^
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by King_Of_Blades on Tue Jul 01 2008, 16:16

    the 1st 1 was great too
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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

    Post by CrispinFreemanWatcher16 on Tue Jul 01 2008, 16:24

    thanks james and aichu^__^

    whats chatspeak aichu?

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    Re: Crispin's 2nd Poem

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