Just Waiting to Burn (A Deidara story) :]

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    Kazekage*Gaara
    Citizen

    Female
    Number of posts : 1936
    Age : 23
    What's up Tab : I like onion rings! (: Get it??
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    Registration date : 2007-10-07

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    Just Waiting to Burn (A Deidara story) :]

    Post by Kazekage*Gaara on Sun Apr 20 2008, 21:52

    Alright, I just wanted to see if anyone would actually read my stories...so...here...

    Note*The blackfire is an ancient spirit, it is neither living or dead. For it is not a human spirit, but the spirit of the ancient element.

    Prologue:

    Seven years ago in SutoKazen [the Village of the Volcano]...

    "Mama! Im home, where are you?" A little Zaika ran through the door to her mothers study. "Mama!" she looked around at the endless piles of books, searching for her mothers smiling face. But when she reached her desk she stopped startled. A man was standing over an object on her mother's desk, suddenly her feet became wet. But when she looked down at her feet, she had to choke back a scream with a gag. She lifted her left foot up and attempted to walk backwards but blood was everywhere now, surrounding her in an endless flood. "M-mama?" she squeaked. An old man's laugh made her look at the face of the man standing over what she just recognized as her mothers lifeless body. "Mama! Why aren't you moving? What's going on?" She started to move foreword.

    The man blocked her. "Hello Zaika." she stared up at him in horror. This creature had killed her mother, slaughtered her for no apparent reason as far as she could see. And now he was going to kill her, she could see it in his face. He had the cold mocking eyes of a predator staring down at it's prey right before the strike. There was no room for mercy.

    "What's the matter with you?" he asked, not a trace of sympathy in his voice.

    She gulped, her mouth had gone too dry for her to speak.

    He chuckled. "What, is this it? The legend of the great blackfire holders going to end here, with this puny runt?" He laughed again. "It appears I would be doing a favor to your ancestors in killing you." He raised his left hand, dripping wet with her mothers' blood.

    Her face of fear was suddenly replaced by unmistakable curiosity. "What's the blackfire? What do you mean ancestors of blackfires? I don't understand!"

    He frowned. "Are you seriously asking me about the blackfire?" she nodded. His smug smile crept back onto his hideous features once more. "Well in that case I better tell you. It's not much of a kill if you don't even know why you're going to die."

    "What about my mother?" She screamed enraged. "How could she know why you killed her if I don't?!"

    He laughed the cruelty of it pierced right through her, but she tried not to let him see it. "Your stupid mother knew exactly what she was doing when she tried to stop me from coming into your precious house. She knew all about your cursed talent for the blackfire." He stared down at her with his mocking eyes again. "But of course you wouldn't know, why would she want to tell you? Why should she warn you about the dangers of the blackfire? You might have killed her too."

    She shook her head, "What do you mean, 'killed her too?' I've never killed anyone!"

    "Your father."

    "What about him? Mom said he died from an attack on the village when I was six!"

    "That's right."

    "Then what about him?"

    "Do you know what attacked the village?" he was clearly enjoying himself.

    Tears streamed down her face. "N-no." Her voice was only a whisper.

    "You."

    "That's not true, you-you're lying!"

    "I never lie. When you acquired the blackfire you were highly unstable. You lost control many times, killing all those fools who came too close."

    "I k-killed my own f-father."

    "I killed my own father." He jabbed.

    Her chin jutted out and her face became a twist of anger and that of the predator. The tables were turning.

    "You said no one wanted to tell me. Why?"

    He snickered. "Because they thought you might turn against the village if you knew. You could destroy them all."

    "But you're telling me. Aren't you afraid I could kill you? You made it clear that I could wipe out an entire village if I wanted to."

    His face became mocking. "You wouldn't be able to kill anyone. True you have the power, but unlike the village I know what kind of girl you are. A spoiled little princess, afraid to do anything that might get her into trouble. You would never be able to kill anyone, you're too weak."

    Her face blackened. "How sure are you?"

    He walked right into the trap. "Pretty sure." He drew out his knife then jerked his arm towards her.

    Something inside her snapped, all the pieces clicked together. She wasn't herself, she was what her people had feared she would be. A monster. "Well, in that case I would have to say that you're dead wrong."

    She was suddenly behind him a spiraling black cloud formed in her hand, she smiled. "No pun intended." Her hand outstretched towards his vest, breaking through all the layers and appearing on his chest. She jerked her hand out as blood poured down his chest and his skin began to turn black, like the color of charred skin.

    His body fell to the ground with a thud and a sickening slide as it moved in the bloody puddle left over by her mother.

    Her eyes darted towards his body, then she caught the sight of a hand falling off of the desk and she had a flash of when she had first walked in. Her mom lying dead on the desk. Her mind was sent into turmoil as her body shook for control. Part of her wanted to run away from here, get away. The other part of her, the part that was taken over with the blackfire wanted to kill again, wanted to see everything burn.

    The smell of smoke brought her out of her daze, the whole floor had caught on fire and black flames leapt violently towards her in an endless cycle. She backed up against the wall then made a dash for the door, crashing out into the hallway she saw that most of the house was already in flames. In her moment of hesitation the blackfire took over her fragile frame, instincts of survival. She burst through the window landing on the hard ground below. Shakily she raised to her feet and headed towards her neighbor Cranchta. She was like a second mother to her. She ran foreword and pounded on the door.

    Her fists caused the door to burst into flames, when she ran in Cranchta was glaring at her, her face contorted in a mask of fear. "What have you done child? You have cursed us all! Must you bring us down with you?"

    "What?"

    "When you allowed the blackfire to take control of your body, you lost complete control. Please tell me you haven't let it kill anyone!"

    "Wh-why?"

    "If you have then the blackfire will surely consume this whole village. It was our duty to make sure the child of the blackfire would never let it be released." she sighed. "We didn't do a good job."

    When she said that the walls fell in crashing around her and crushing Cranchta. "No!" Zaika screamed. But it was soon lost as the hissing of the fire deafened her. She ran outside and headed towards the gate to the village, leading out into the caverns. She chose a path on the right, tiny cherry blossoms were painted on the walls telling her which way led to the outside world. She ran for what seemed like hours trying to get out. Finally she emerged from the tunnel, gasping for breath she fell down and slowly sunk into a deep sleep. When she woke up she traveled to the next village, the Village hidden in the Mist.

    For eight years she has lived in that village, she felt good to be next to water. As if maybe, just maybe, someday it could extinguish the stupid spirit of the blackfire that burned fiercely beneath her skin. Just waiting to burn.
    avatar
    Kazekage*Gaara
    Citizen

    Female
    Number of posts : 1936
    Age : 23
    What's up Tab : I like onion rings! (: Get it??
    Village : Scorpion
    Happiness bar :
    99 / 10099 / 100

    Registration date : 2007-10-07

    AMP
    Natural: 8
    Power: 8
    Instinct: 8

    Re: Just Waiting to Burn (A Deidara story) :]

    Post by Kazekage*Gaara on Sun Apr 20 2008, 21:55

    Feel free to leave a comment!

    (I didn't want to have to edit the message above. -.-)
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    Akatsuki-Sakura
    Citizen

    Female
    Number of posts : 1
    Age : 24
    Village : Scorpion
    Happiness bar :
    75 / 10075 / 100

    Registration date : 2008-07-07

    AMP
    Natural: 0
    Power: 0
    Instinct: 0

    Re: Just Waiting to Burn (A Deidara story) :]

    Post by Akatsuki-Sakura on Thu Jul 10 2008, 00:51

    It was very interesting. I liked it. you'll have to send me a link when you post all of it. K? Puppy Dog Eyes

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    Re: Just Waiting to Burn (A Deidara story) :]

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