A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

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    Is the story better now that saba is helping?

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    Darkflame
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    A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Darkflame on Thu Mar 27 2008, 19:22

    The minutes turned to hours as the war continued, but the intensity of it lessened. Soon it was nothing but a few small battles here and there.




    The streets were littered with bodies, mostly of volcano-nin. I wondered around in a daze, not understanding what was happening. Gust, looking for survivors, soon found me, and explained the situation. “The enemy has invaded, and our numbers are down,” she said somberly. “If you lose a battle, they’ll take you hostage.”


    I nodded and thanked her. She smiled sadly, then turned and ran off. I had a face wrap on; the only thing she knew was how I was a member of the village, from the red headband hanging from my neck.



    Not sure what to do, I wondered aimlessly around the village. I soon came to a large pool of magma, used for academy students to practice their jutsu. But just then, it was a battle field.



    I came across Gust and another ice shinobi. As they fought, it was clear that the enemy wasn’t your run-of-mill ninja; I would have guess Jonin at least.



    Though Gust was probably just as powerful, she was losing. She’d been at this for a while, and she was tired, while the enemy was running on fresh energy.



    I came up as Gust was catching her breath. “Need some help?” I asked.



    She eyed me gratefully. “Yeah,” she said breathlessly. I noticed she had a wound o her shoulder which had reopened.



    “Thank you…but I don’t even know your name.”



    I paused. “Just…call me a friend,” I said simply.



    I then noticed, out of the corner of my eye, the enemy making swift hand signs. Before Gust could question it, I screamed, “Look out!”



    I pushed her out of the way in time to see the ice needles fly by us. We both fell, then scrambled to get back on our feet. Gust nodded her thanks.



    Quickly, I turned to face the enemy. “Supa-ku Juuten!” (Spark Plug)



    The shock hit him before he could dodge it. “That’ll stay in your body, slowly attacking your nervous system. Hurts like hell, too.”



    I felt Gust’s eyes on me, and as I turned to her, she mumbled, “I know that jutsu…”

    But the enemy was back on his feet quicker than I anticipated. “Kakuu Hi!” (Aerial Ice)



    I was able to counter it in time. “Hibana Ryouiki!” (Spark Field)



    The lightning made a barrier around us, and I smiled as the ice bounced off.



    “W-what?” Gust stuttered, frowning at me.



    I sighed. “You still haven’t figured it yet, eh?”



    She titled her head, puzzled.



    I slowly undid the wrapping which hid my face. Earlier, I had fallen over a pile of debris, just to collide face first with more debris. The best I could do to keep the wounds clean was to wrap up my whole face. The cuts were small and few, but deep.



    I took off the rest of the bandage. “It’s me,” I said softly. “It’s Spark.”



    Her eyes grew wide as she searched my face, while hers was shocked. Her mouth opened and closed, but no sound came out. Finally, her eyes rolled in the back of her head, and she fainted, leaving me alone to finish the enemy.



    I sighed again, and redid the bandages across my face. The ice-nin smirked at my fallen companion, then swiftly ran towards me, making quick hand signs.



    “Supa-ku Joukeiki.” (Spark Boom)



    A ball of electricity formed under him; he stopped in mid hand-sign and looked down, shocked. It then exploded, and sent him flying across the field to land on the other side of the magma, unconscious.



    I breathed out in relief, then bent down to Gust. I thought the best course of action would be to bring her to the children’s hiding place.



    I was uncomfortable with carrying her; I didn’t want to hurt her. I had plenty of chakra left, so I decided to bring her there using a jutsu.



    “Supa-ku Nedai.” (Spark Bed)



    I was able to put her on a bed, controlled by chakra strings. When we reached the house, I saw Tundra. It had been so long, I wanted to talk to him; but now wasn’t the time. He bristled when he saw me with Gust, who was out like a light.



    “What happened?” Tundra yelled, as he ran over to Gust.



    “She fainted,” was my answer.



    He rolled his eyes. “I can see that.” Yep, same old Tundra. “How?”



    I shrugged. “She was fine during the battle.”



    “What?”



    “We were fighting this ice-nin, but then…”



    I was cut off when Gust stirred.



    She opened her eyes, and turned to stare at me. “Spark?” she mumbled.



    I caught the look of pain that flashed through Tundra’s face. “No, Gust,” she said softly. “Spark’s gone, you know that.”



    “No, he’s right there…”she trailed off, and fainted again


    Last edited by Darkflame on Fri Jun 11 2010, 15:06; edited 1 time in total
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    sabaku no ketsueki
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by sabaku no ketsueki on Thu Mar 27 2008, 19:38

    Bwahaha
    I see you got it ok!
    and I did edit this to, FYI Happy
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    Darkflame
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Darkflame on Thu Mar 27 2008, 19:42

    lol that is why i put the poll lol
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Codiac on Sat Mar 29 2008, 18:25

    ...
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Darkflame on Wed Apr 09 2008, 19:21

    wht cod?
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Destinykil on Sat Apr 12 2008, 15:34

    tis decent.....better
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Darkflame on Sun Apr 13 2008, 05:29

    cuz i actually had someone refise it lol... and she said shes only still on my 3rd paragrapth of the next chapter... must be rewriting it...
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Destinykil on Sun Apr 13 2008, 11:24

    revise*
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    sabaku no ketsueki
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by sabaku no ketsueki on Mon Apr 14 2008, 20:20

    yeah, cause you're spelling is hopless
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by KarateKeyaQ on Thu May 15 2008, 20:12

    Saba, nice job. Flamey, nice story!
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    Re: A New Beginning (Ch. 4 The End?)

    Post by Darkflame on Tue May 20 2008, 14:32

    thanks and dose going back and reading it more understand able?

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