Choosing The Right Path

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    Total Votes: 14
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    jake989
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by jake989 on Sat Dec 01 2007, 01:34

    YES FOR LONG!!!! Oh Yeah!
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    Angelic Harmony
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by Angelic Harmony on Sat Dec 01 2007, 01:37

    I wasnt here for like a week!!!
    I would've been ahead of you!
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    jake989
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by jake989 on Sat Dec 01 2007, 01:41

    Well just write ur story cause I wanna know what happens next!
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    Angelic Harmony
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by Angelic Harmony on Sat Dec 01 2007, 01:54

    *Mutters*

    Bossy ass...

    *Writes story*
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    jake989
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by jake989 on Sat Dec 01 2007, 02:18

    I sry but the first one was so good I just want to hear the next one!
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    Angelic Harmony
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by Angelic Harmony on Sat Dec 01 2007, 02:32

    Im done anyway, gonna post it now.
    Personally, I love your profile
    Lol
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    D-Dei
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    BEL.the.Ripper.

    Spoiler:
    The first Alice was a courageous red one
    With a Sword in one hand through Wonderland
    She cut down, many things that stood in her way
    Making a path that was a trail of blood
    The alice walked deep into the woods and then she was trapped
    A prisoned sinner
    There was no way of knowing she was there
    Except the red path that followed behind her

    The second Alice was a calm, blue one
    Singing a song that filled wonderland
    The false notes which he sang till the end
    Created a crazy world in wonderland
    That Alice was born of a Flower
    Was then shot by a cross-eyed man
    Out from the wound then bloomed a flower
    Everyone that had loved him, soon began to die

    The third Alice was an innocent green one
    A beautiful figure there in wonderland
    She had fooled many people to do her bid
    A strange country was then created up
    The Alice was the queen of the country
    Possessed by a dream of distortion
    Afraid of losing her life to death
    Ruling the country of hers forever

    Walking down a red path in the forest
    Under the blue rose trees, the two had tea time
    An invitation to them from the castle was
    The playing card of hearts

    The fourth Alice was a pair of children twins
    They were curious througout the wonderland
    They traveled through the doors to see all kinds of things
    From there wandering that they had just arrived
    A stubborn big sister, and smart little brother

    They were nearing the first alice's wonderland
    The two were to never to wake from their dream
    The twins then wandered through wonderland endlessly!

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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by D-Dei on Tue Dec 04 2007, 18:58

    Toshiro looked like he was about to protect before Tsundae shot him an annoyed look. Sighing in defeat, Toshiro glared at Maeko lightly, who glared right back.

    dont you mean protest?

    uh.. sorry, ><;; i do this sometimes..

    and uh.. nice, i read #2 before i read this one so i was confuzzled ><;;
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    Kiami
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by Kiami on Tue Dec 04 2007, 19:06

    Lmao, Charm-chan made an error

    oh wells..I do it alot too -.-
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    D-Dei
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    What's up Tab : "I've made up my mind. I'm gonna become an emu."

    BEL.the.Ripper.

    Spoiler:
    The first Alice was a courageous red one
    With a Sword in one hand through Wonderland
    She cut down, many things that stood in her way
    Making a path that was a trail of blood
    The alice walked deep into the woods and then she was trapped
    A prisoned sinner
    There was no way of knowing she was there
    Except the red path that followed behind her

    The second Alice was a calm, blue one
    Singing a song that filled wonderland
    The false notes which he sang till the end
    Created a crazy world in wonderland
    That Alice was born of a Flower
    Was then shot by a cross-eyed man
    Out from the wound then bloomed a flower
    Everyone that had loved him, soon began to die

    The third Alice was an innocent green one
    A beautiful figure there in wonderland
    She had fooled many people to do her bid
    A strange country was then created up
    The Alice was the queen of the country
    Possessed by a dream of distortion
    Afraid of losing her life to death
    Ruling the country of hers forever

    Walking down a red path in the forest
    Under the blue rose trees, the two had tea time
    An invitation to them from the castle was
    The playing card of hearts

    The fourth Alice was a pair of children twins
    They were curious througout the wonderland
    They traveled through the doors to see all kinds of things
    From there wandering that they had just arrived
    A stubborn big sister, and smart little brother

    They were nearing the first alice's wonderland
    The two were to never to wake from their dream
    The twins then wandered through wonderland endlessly!

    Fanclubs : Deidara Fanclub.
    Village : Military
    Happiness bar :
    70 / 10070 / 100

    Registration date : 2007-07-31

    AMP
    Natural: 0
    Power: 0
    Instinct: 0

    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by D-Dei on Tue Dec 04 2007, 19:07

    we all do... even deathy...
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    Friesenator
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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

    Post by Friesenator on Fri Mar 07 2008, 23:30

    It was good. The beginning was good, just kind of bland. I'm just saying this because I know you're a great writer, but I just din't really find you're story memorable at the moment. Maybe I have to read another chapter... Did you put up a second chapter? First chapters are usually slow for all writers, novices or experts.

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    Re: Choosing The Right Path

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